Dedicated to a Comrade having a hard time, politically and otherwise – you aren’t the only one.
The SWP has reached an impasse.
Members of the SWP now reject or question the accepted truths and commands.
The sense of forward advance that was once felt has now disappeared.
Hundreds now dissolved away by frustration anger and doubt, yes, more importantly however political differences and principles.
Stranded at a stand still, as the organisation galls down a dark, quite and solemn pace towards erasing the last 8 months of revolutionary despair which will have gripped, with an encompassing and stone cold blitz feeling felt among the many. The new, old, young, and experienced.
The disconnection, unfortunately, is almost now permanent. As the branches sway, panic and scramble onwards. The busy-like nature of the weekly meeting, things to build, stalls to do, busy like, even more than ever - a quick succession of busy nothings.
And the irremovable glint in each’s eye, of the horrible scaring, of the entire integrity of that soul – politically, physical and mentally.
Withering of the strongest of the strong.
No brave face can mask it.
An open wound which refuses to heal. No matter time’s passing. The concomitant of the feeling remains; how could this have happened?
Searching for the determination; the root. Able to transcend from one to the next generation of fighters – the methods, the training, the thinking, the acting, the relating.
A Virus of Culture
A Virus - all soured, corrupted, mechanical, inadequate, unemotional, inhuman, and systematic.
It is what infects a comrade, the circles, the philosophy, the atmosphere, the living & then the breathing organ in which it paints us with its colours, strengths and vibrancies.
A culture must be constantly nurtured, paid meticulous attention to when sick, fostered, guided. - given the chance to lead – the opportunity to build – the ability to develop and evolve living revolutionary ideas, by looking on those that have come to past, and those who decay to their death.
Time is short, amplifying the most precious questions and prominent crisis which confronts us.
Questions, which are often visited. Chipped away at by the old comrade, who comes up against the metaphorical and physically gigantic concrete wall; too high to climb or destroy, by the efforts of a sole.
Rebounding the cycle of your own efforts, its own echo - no answer, no reply, nothing – despair, frustration, sorrow, confusion, anger, bitterness, isolation.
Death of the idea, and the hope which came with it.
To change something, anything, at this point, the worst point.
Consigned to the graveyard of once living ideas, one in which sorted to amass inspiration and militancy of those here, and yet to come.
A choking culture, selectivity, breeding animosity between those closest.
The questions, why them, not I, not us, not all?
The fostering of new comrades in preparation to join the circles of thought and the warring bands that shuffle, jostle and scuffle for weight, influence – and ultimately power.
It is a deep rooted problem. Engrained & inbuilt, a way of ‘things’ - Greying gold dust
As those pushed to the front, or proped up, often with little total understanding of their use in another’s means to the ends.
A percentile effect; of those of a generation, the many left to fall in between the gaps of the organisation, and the cracks in which spring from its virused culture: Lost revolutionaries, and with them; lost potential, a lost far future, but near. – Lost Gold Dust
The unappreciated, fighting to grow, completing the ‘dogs-work’, acting as the main mechanical cog, buried beneath the shiner, but smaller cogs, that overlap, overplaced and overlay it.
Yet never the time to spare or interest and encouragement given, to develop beyond your practical perfections, you’re fighting, for the sake of fighting strong, time passes and you’ve grown tired, as revolutionary enthusiasm stagnates, from the lack of care placed under you.
The same is no longer the same; it’s lost its meaning, as you repeat, repeat, and repeat, repeat.
The disconnection growing at each stroke of disarray and crisis – Exhausted Gold Dust
The excited, ever charged, with vigour and zeal to build the organ, they truly want and feel to succeed with every fibre, every thought, every feeling.
But bound to wonder for an answer, a sign – nothing.
Left to explore and wonder, search new possibilities, but alone.
As the organ stagnates, reclines, its pulse slowing, its tone fading, its resonance breaking.
If only, you dream. The organ was next to you, engaging, renewing, growing and living- off this new potential.
Instead rusting, squeaking, if not completely silent in all but words and symbols. As if an error, an incompatibility- Frustrated Gold Dust
Constantly fighting to remedy the immediate problems in the organ, to make a dent, but it regrows even thornier.
At what point will one be able to build as where one’s ambitions truly lay or seek?
Not Deviation, Marxism; living and growing
Relating and learning from people, who struggle to survive or live today.
Against replication, skewing and stretching past struggles to apply now.
The past, always important and a part of, but never the same, never inevitable, never guaranteed, never inherent- No blueprints.
Agency evolves, composition composites’ and compresses, relations react, feelings fester, tensions sinuating.
Many gone now, the organ in failure, decaying – now lays still; and will remain still, but still-borne cannot be what is made from its death.
A real culture different to before. Forged in genuine truth, encouragement, development, trust, confidence, freedom and thought, while free from slant, bias, personal benefit, factioneering and manoeuvre.
A real want for a culture which is breathing of the class, yet instead compromising for a simple plinth listings the organs norms, constructs, its policy – The extent of relations with the Gold Dust.
This must be and can only be created through the process of fighting through real democracy.
To free the embryonic potential inside of each and every separate particle of Gold Dust – Actualised Gold Dust
This culture must be fostered and encouraged through and for a maximum living Marxism. A culture of permanent inclusivity, flexibility and depthful discussion and debate and so much more – as to achieve a real vision, an organ that intertwines with class struggle, in practise, and further to liberate the successes and failures of prospects in which it is engaged in, openly and honestly.
As is an essential of vanguard’s memory. A memory of not purely words, but of reality – The class cannot be fooled, we can only fool ourselves.
The memory learns from the experiences of all. Managing, filtering and disrupting this process forms cracks, gaps and seizures in this memory.
The infection grows.
Angel Jackson - FL Editor